For Sale: Two Houses of Congress, Slightly Used

Administration officials announced plans today to spin off the legislative branch and auction it to private equity. Included in the sale will be both Houses of Congress, as well as the Government Accountability Office (GAO), and Congressional Budget Office (CBO). Analysts expressed surprise in the privatization scheme, but supported an effort to 'slim down' a federal government bloated with 'dead weight'.

Tom D. Harry, Bear Sterns analyst said, “Bush is working hard running the administration and is committed to continuing his current role at least until the end of his term. He and [Vice President] Dick Cheney are making the tough decisions needed to move the government forward and create taxpayer value. The value of the real estate alone is worth tens of millions of dollars."

When asked whether proceeds from the sale would be used to pay down the national debt, administration officials responded that the cabinet was looking at a wide variety of uses, including stabalizing the current pro-western Iraqi regime, supporting democracy in the middle east and fighting the War on Terror.

Potential bidders include Kohlberg Kravis Roberts, the Blackstone Group and Cerberus Capital Management. Halliburton is also said to be among the public firms interested in the purchase.